10 Tips for Moving Your Family Across the Country

Moving from coast to coast and traveling for months at a time can be challenging to say the least.  Here is a fun list our family has discovered takes the edge off.  Well, this list and a glass of wine.

1. The family meeting.  It doesn’t have to be all “This Is Us” when you call a family meeting.  Hopefully, you’ve been including the family in conversations along the way so nothing comes as a complete shock.  Talk with your kids about it in a way that helps them look forward to where they are going. Even preschoolers are intuitive, so talk them through it, but make sure to set a positive tone. And if it doesn’t go all Disney Channel-sitcom-wrap-up after 22 minutes, don’t despair.  It gets better with time.
2. If you can move during the summer or at a natural transition point...do it. Other transition points include before the New Year or at Spring Break. We did one move after our daughter finished her school play. That, to her, let her feel like she completed a project and that we took her feelings into consideration. (She was the best squirrel in Willy Wonka’s factory, btw.)
3. Preserve the date night. Moving is the most stressful thing, second only to divorce.  Take care of your spouse and remind them and yourself that you care.
4. Give your kids the extra moments. Extra? Okay.  Well maybe there are no “extra” moments, but tweet about politics later and be with your littles now. We like to have little family dance parties where we just crank the music and dance it out.  The kids love these impromptu moments. Music is always a life preserver.
5. Create a plan. It doesn’t mean you’ll stick to it.  It’s about as foolproof as your birth plan was, but just having some semblance of purpose and understanding that there is a logical way to get to the other side is extremely helpful to your psyche, which may be just slightly off the hinges at the moment.
6. Divide responsibilities between partners. When you get to work moving, make sure you are supporting and supported.  Changing your address, getting boxes, getting rid of unwanted items, taking apart beds...All hands on deck!
7. Remove the kids with a sitter when the movers take everything from your home.  Heck. It’s traumatic for me to see things move and get thrown out.  Not to mention it’s just safer not to have Curly and Moe under your feet when the movers are there too.
8. Let your kids help pack and unpack. Once the dust settles, empower the kiddos.  Putting those busy hands to work organizing toys or the utensil drawer can be a big help.  They will be proud of their work and you will be too.
9. Don’t forget the heart. Move whatever was the centerpiece or something that is the indicator of your home.  It preserves some amount of sameness which helps relieve anxiety. We move our family picture wall back and forth across the country.  It’s a layout of about 10 items, including a clock, 3 framed maps, and family pictures in black and white.  When our kids see this covering the main family room wall, it tells them, subconsciously, that this is home.
10. Surround yourself with close friends and family that remind you of your sense of humor. We stayed with a friend and her twin boys for a few days during our most recent move.  Both our husbands were away on work and we kept each other in stitches calling ourselves sister wives, laughing at ourselves and enjoying our kids.  I realized that this friend brought out the best in me during a trying time and those are the best of friends and family.